Ode to T9Word and Language Follies

So I have this really bad habit of not reading what I text before I send it, which makes texting rather entertaining for my friends. On top of that, I just discovered this whole T9word concept (I know, welcome to the 21st century Manda.) I'm starting to learn which words I need to check, but I think my phone has a mind of it's own sometimes. For example, no matter how many times I type the word 'sounds,' my phone brings up the letters 'pmtmdp'...which, in case you were wondering, isn't a word...yet, somehow in Amanda-language it's more common...and did you know that the word 'dummies' is more common than 'funnier'? What is the world coming to?

I got to thinking about language though, and I shouldn't be surprised that this happens to me. I often find myself making funny word choices, thinking that it clearly makes sense to me, only to see the receiver of my rhetoric tilt their head and say, "What?" Then as I repeat it, have them ask me to repeat it...again...oh, dear...

Or the many times I get so excited about what I am saying that my brain working faster than my mouth, literally causing my words to make NO SENSE...

Or when I quote movies, that's just a disaster, mostly because 90% of the people I talk to have no idea how my brain used such transductive reasoning to come to the phrase that I said.

Or the time when I told everyone in Spanish that I loved underwear...yeah, not my finest moment.

Or how about every time I'm walking somewhere and people watch my hands as I compulsively "handspell" my own thoughts...yes, even when I run I do it...strange, I know...

So I write this post in hopes that others have had such blunders and would be so kind as to share them with me, and the rest of the world, thus easing my tongue-twister woes...